If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
