the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize