Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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