: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
