If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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