I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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