At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
