I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
