Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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