She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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