When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
