Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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