Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I don't think brook has ever known best
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
What drink are we having for lunch?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I am one with the molecules
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
