Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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