where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
