So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
