I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize