Can Purell be used as lube?
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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