i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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