I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
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