guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
