The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize