Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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