He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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