I must be too annoying 4 u.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I still have a little drunk in my system
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
