The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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