You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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