oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
