i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with two different species that night
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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