I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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