Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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