So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Randomize