The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
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