exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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