How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
