i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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