Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
