Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
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