Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
We're too hungover to prance.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I'm both gender and math confused
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
