So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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