I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
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