if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I need to align my fucking chakras
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize