**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize