we should wear snuggies to the strip club
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
There r osticjed everywhere
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
