Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Randomize
