Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
