The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
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