and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
