i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.