I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Alive.
So much puke
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Randomize