Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize