I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
